Ok ladies, fess up, how many times has your spouse or boyfriend showed up on Valentines Day or Mothers Day with the traditional flowers, candy or teddy bear holding a heart? Most of the time we’re thinking “How sweet!” but let’s get real, don’t you sometimes wish he would put a tad more thought into it? Instead of buying what’s readily easy to grab off the Valentines Day shelves at the grocery store on his way out from picking up milk?
Men we love you, but please pay attention, we’re about to give you some great tips on how to REALLY choose a gift for the woman in your life.
Tip #1: Know her love language when gift giving
What’s that you say? Love language? Yes, that’s right, every one of us (men and women) speaks our own love language in our relationships. Some women are more practical than others, some prefer creative gifts, some prefer acts of love. Know your loved one and become tuned into what she wants and needs are and you’ll then be able to make a more informed and thoughtful choice when purchasing that next gift for her. This book is an excellent read I recommend it to anyone who has ever wanted to improve their relationships and better understand your loved ones.
Look around the home, do you see a lot of knick-knacks and collectibles? Does she collect a certain type of collectible such as brand or is it a specific theme? Perhaps there are no knick-knacks around, that’s generally a sign she’s not really into them. Perhaps she is more frugal and practical? Does that mean she wants a toaster for a gift or a blender? Not necessarily. Remember things that are part of everyday household chores are really more of a tool to get things done. Unless she’s hinted that she wanted a new blender as a gift, that’s not always the best choice for the practical woman. Perhaps instead think outside of the box, otherwise, that might be where you’ll be sleeping…
For example last year for our 14th-anniversary gift my husband bought me a desk after hearing me complain about how mine was literally held together with duct tape! I absolutely LOVE my desk and will cherish it for years to come!
Tip #2: Literally sweep her off her feet through acts of service!
Regardless of what your love language is, I don’t know anyone who doesn’t appreciate having acts of service performed for them. That being said, when you read “The 5 Love Languages” you’ll get a better idea of whether acts of service is on her top gift preference. For example, if you notice the kitchen is an eyesore and you clean it up without her mentioning it: how does she respond? If she jumps for joy and her smile beams from ear to ear, odds are she will LOVE acts of service as a gift! (not to mention you might ‘get lucky’ with her that night hint, hint!) Some women would prefer their spouse to clean the kitchen than be given flowers and jewelry.
Years ago when my youngest was a toddler he had a habit of playing with his toy cars on my Grandma’s antique piano. My husband had started a hobby of woodworking and decided to do something that would keep our son entertained and less likely to play cars on the piano that he knew was precious to me. So he built and designed a toy car ramp for him and he still plays with it after all these years! It meant so much to me that he went out of his way to make this. Here are some pics of the ramp:
Tip #3 When you do go out, make sure your children know that date night is a priority
What better way for your children to know that their parents are in a healthy and happy relationship than by going on regular dates with your spouse and not just special occasions like Valentines Day. This is not only a gift for your wife but a gift for your children. By setting an example to them on how to treat their mother, they will grow up expecting the same from their relationships. Plus they will show more respect for her when they see you model that relationship in front of them as well. If you have a daughter, surely you want the men in her life to treat her with great care and respect. Show her that by showing your spouse that same respect as well as show your sons how to do the same for their future spouse.
Tip #4: Treat her to a day at the spa
As moms, we tend to work from sun up to sun down and there is rarely a real break for us. If you notice your spouse doesn’t ever seem to find time for self-care or time out with her friends, then arrange that time for her. Arrange for childcare if need be than purchase a massage, facial, and/or pedicure/manicure. Better yet a spa package at her favorite day spa or from a reputable massage therapist. If she’s never had a therapeutic massage make sure she’s comfortable with the idea of getting one first. Not all women are, especially if it’s a male therapist. You could even get a couples massage! (again I can’t stress enough to find a reputable day spa for this!) Many day spas carry gift certificates and a package deal will typically get you more for your money’s worth. Groupon is also a great place to look for those types of deals.
Tip#4: Take her on an overnight stay-cation at a nearby hotel
You may not have time to travel somewhere but surely you can travel to a local hotel. Find one that has a Jacuzzi and either room service or continental breakfast. Order room service for dinner or plan ahead with take-out from her favorite restaurant. Even better if you can set the room up ahead of time with Valentine’s decor and leave her a mushy love note on the bed with rose petals.
Tip#5: Diamonds really are a girl’s best friend, however…
Here’s the thing about jewelry, most women have VERY specific taste in what they like or don’t like to wear. Pay attention to what she owns and actually wears before you make a lavish purchase. With any jewelry purchase, you should really know what your wife/girlfriend likes before you buy. Does she have any allergies to certain types of metals? Have you ever noticed she doesn’t wear certain jewelry or wears one kind more than another? Find out why that is. She may have sensory issues or just simply doesn’t like bracelets or earrings. Does she normally wear silver or gold? The point is if you want your spouse to truly enjoy what you buy her and actually wear it, make sure it’s comfortable and fitting to her personality. A well thought out jewelry purchase can be cherished and treasured for many years, it’s worth it to put a little thought into it don’t you agree? Also, believe it or not, some women do NOT like big diamonds! Shocking right? I’m one of them, I prefer small and petite for rings and earrings because my hands and ears are petite. Anything big and heavy would be uncomfortable. Love them on others just not for me.
Tip#6: Write down your feelings for your spouse and present it in a unique way
If you are a man of little words this is especially a gift that your wife will treasure! Some tips for gifts of prose: Write a poem and frame it in a lovely frame. Write up 14 reasons why you love her and
give her one every day or all at once on a lovely paper in an envelope and present it to her. Get a pack of cards and on each card write something you love about her, punch a hole in each card and put it on a ring. What really matters is that you tell her how much you love and appreciate her for all the little things she does. Oh and leave a box of tissues nearby when you do. It’s for you of course. *wink*
I bought a notebook journal yesterday while I was at the store with my Husband. I told him it was to help me stay focused and motivated. This afternoon I opened it up and found this sweet note he wrote for me. It says: “Always remember; You are a great woman! You are a great mother! You are a successful business woman! You are a great person! You will be successful! You are capable of accomplishing great things! Your husband supports you!” It’s been a long journey for us both and while he hasn’t always seen my vision from the beginning, to have him onboard now makes all the difference for me. If your spouse/partner has a dream, support it no matter how far off it sounds. It’s amazing what you can accomplish when the people who love you support you and stand behind you ?%! . . . . . . . . . . . . #Ilovemyhusband #spousesupport #dreamscometrue #success #inspiration #gratitude #gratitudejournal #attitudeofgratitude #thesecret #thinkandgrowrich #successprinciples
Tip#7: Get your children involved in the gift giving
If your wife is usually the one behind all the gift giving for everyone, this is especially thoughtful! Have a secret meeting with your children and have them each make a special Valentines Day card and/or craft for their mom. Make sure they mention one thing they appreciate about her and include that in the gift. Most mom’s feel underappreciated for all they do so this will surely hit a home run with her!
Tip#8: Reminisce with her and make something memorable
Put together either a digital photo album or a real photo album and create something unique with memories you both shared from a special occasion in your past. Whether it’s your wedding, honeymoon, a family vacation getaway; she will surely love having a beautiful photo album of your special time together. Imagine years from now when you’re celebrating your 25th or even 50th wedding anniversary what sweet memories you’ll have to share together!
Tip#9: Be a tourist in your own town!
Get to know your own town a bit better and go on a tour! Maybe rent some Segways or a fancy car for the day just for kicks! Check out any local fairs, hot tourist spots, or historical locations. More than anything spend some quality time with each other and ask questions and share your feelings with one another.
Tip#10: Don’t sweat the small stuff and follow your heart
Nobody knows your wife better than you do right? All these tips are just advice after all, but more than anything if you do it with love than that’s what really matters at the end of the day. Show her you love her and appreciate her and do it every day in little ways. Those little things add up to big things after all. And wives guess what? You are just as responsible for keeping the romance alive, remember marriage is an equal partnership! So do something every day to bring light and love into your relationship.♥
What are some of YOUR favorite gifts you’ve received or given? Have some great suggestions? Share in a comment below!
As the founder of Why Not Mom; a unique online directory of mom-owned boutiques and mom-invented products, Tonia has strived to create a unique organization of female business owners, creating a diverse network that assists each other in driving more business to one another, in addition to providing tools and resources to achieve success in their business endeavors. It is her passion to make Why Not Mom the world’s largest online directory of women-owned businesses in the pursuit of strengthening families and supporting small business owners worldwide.